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The Wandering Widow

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Home » Coping with Grief» Featured» Widowhood » A Letter To Myself on New Year’s Eve 2019

A Letter To Myself on New Year’s Eve 2019

December 31, 2019 By Lisa Bain

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For all of the trouble you’ve been through
The blessings doubled just for you, the best is yet to come
Today is the first day of the best days of your life
You ain’t seen nothing yet.

Frank Sinatra, The Best Is Yet To Come

A Keeping It Real Post

I know. Everyone you know is posting profound reviews on this extra-special New Year’s Eve. It’s not every year we find ourselves on the precipice of both a new year and a new decade. This isn’t that post. These days I don’t spend much time looking back, but nights like this seem to allow for some rear-view mirror indulgence.

I sometimes write letters to my past self with the advice I wish I’d had then. Dorky, I know. But it’s a helpful exercise to process growth, so here goes.

Dear Lisa on 31 December 2009,

It’s New Year’s Eve 2019, and I thought you’d like some advice about what lies ahead in the next decade.

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. Scratch that. It was the okay-est of times, then it got all FUBAR, and only then it was the best of times. In the ten years ahead, you will experience the highest of highs and the lowest lows. You’ll deal with everything life lobs your way, however ungraceful and messy it may be. It will rarely be easy, but you somehow always manage to find the beauty in this thing we call life.

Through everything (buckle up, Buttercup, you’re in for one helluva ride), you not only survive, you thrive, although I know you won’t believe it when you’re in the midst of the FUBAR part. And while you are a total badass, don’t forget to be kind to yourself. Cut yourself the same slack you cut everyone else. You’re worth it.

Live your life. Live it big, live it soft, live it loud, live it to the max. It’s okay to be afraid, just don’t let fear stop you from living. Never forget you aren’t alone and that you are loved. Keep going even when it’s hard. You’ve got this. And I’ll be waiting for you here at the other end of the decade with an incredible life that you will love. I promise you, the best is yet to come.

XO,
Lisa

Happy New Year

So here we are. Midnight is a few hours away. I can remember that first New Year’s AD. The thought of a new calendar year without him in it a single day was incomprehensible.

I don’t have any of those feelings about this new decade. This decade is mine. I’m so different from that me ten years ago. I barely recognize that woman, but love her for everything she did to take care of me and get me here today.

To all my W sisters struggling tonight, I’m sending you wishes for peace, love, and light. Happy New Year.

XOXO,
The Wandering Widow
Live Now. Dream Big. Love Fierce.

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Filed Under: Coping with Grief, Featured, Widowhood Tagged With: Bereavement, Broken Open, Coping, Grief, Grief Journey, grief milestones, Grief Recovery, Grieving, Holidays, Life After Loss, Live Now, Loss, New Year's Eve, Reckless Truth Teller, Survivor, widow, Widowhood, Widows


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Heart of a Kingdom is a riveting tale of love, courage, loss, and survival set in the magical Kingdom of the Talking Tres, and the City of Belfast. Newly widowed Queen Libby must endure the devastating loss of her husband, do the … Read More about New Book: Heart Of A Kingdom

A Little About Me

Lisa Bain became a young widow in 2016 after losing her husband to cancer. She quickly learned we live in a grief phobic society, which isolates the grieving even further. With both humor and heartbreak, she shares her story and lessons she's learned to help those grieving remember they aren't alone, and to help their family and friends that just don't know what to do to help.

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