Holiday Permission Slip

“Let today mark a new beginning for you. Give yourself permission to say NO without feeling guilty, mean, or selfish. Anybody who gets upset and/or expects you to say YES all of the time clearly doesn’t have your interest at heart. Always remember: You have a right to say NO without having to explain yourself. Be at peace with your decisions.”
~Stephanie Lahart

A Keeping It Real Post

To My Fellow Bereaved:

Whether it’s your first holiday season as a Widow or your twentieth, this time of year can be challenging. And by challenging, I mean it’s like taking a hot poker to the eyeball. As we continue to deal with the onslaught of holiday festivities and endless reminders that our loved ones are no longer with us, please feel free to use the following permission slip to politely excuse yourself from any events or social gatherings.

To Whom It May Concern:

Thank you for inviting _________________________ to attend your

_ Company party

_ Family gathering

_ Birthday/Wedding/Funeral

_ Christmas carols

_ Game night

_ New Year’s Celebration

_ Miscellaneous peopling

Unfortunately, she is unable to attend for secret reasons.

Sincerely,
The Wandering Widow

Okay, so I totally plagiarized the “secret reasons” excuse from E.B. White’s famous September 28, 1956 letter, but it still works.

You don’t need to give an excuse, and you sure as heck don’t need to feel obligated to attend. Trust your heart. If you need to go and be with people, go and give yourself permission to leave as early as you feel uncomfortable (reference my earlier post on exit strategies). If you feel the need to stay on the couch and eat Oreos, do that. Whatever you do, be kind to yourself and make space for your grief at this difficult time of the year.

Oh, and while you certainly don’t need it, if it makes you feel better, you have my permission.

XOXO,
The Wandering Widow
Live Now. Dream Big. Love Fierce.